Optimistic but realistic

I love to travel, to learn, to try to be kind...do you?  Try to be kind?  Is that an uppermost goal in anyone's mind anymore?  I've learned stressful events, whether personal or political, bring out the "true colours" in people.  We can see true nature of humankind...or human-mean through these stressful events.  We see illusions of human nature most of the time.  In happy times we can act our best when basic primal instincts to survive are not triggered.

I like to be happy- we all do.  It's natural.  In order to lessen stress on our bodies and minds we must learn more about our natural world.  Who are we and why are we here?  So much more can be learned if we open our minds and explore the imagination.  Einstein said something like "imagination is more important than knowledge" but I want to take that brilliant statement to a different level.  I'd like to say good imaginations are more important than traditional education, but bad imaginations can ruin the world.  Imaginations are either good or bad.  That's all we need to know for a start.

I have a good imagination.  I seek out others who feel the same way.  How can we help?  How can we learn more about important clues of our world?  It's not about waste, money, production, pollution, lying to ourselves, synthetic drugs, pushing our agendas, ignoring poverty and hunger, cruelty to anything.

Do no harm.  It will come back at you threefold.  We need to find the truth and beauty of our existence.  Starting now.

Back from the Caribbean

I'm back.  I needed a break from writing.  It didn't seem to make sense to write stuff except for my dream journal and travel journal.  I gave up on fiction for a bit.  My dream journal should be published someday.  If Star Water becomes more popular I'll do the dream publishing

thing...because I'm learning to predict and recognize events through these night visions.  The main thing is to remember a key scene the minute I wake up, like a computer file.  It opens the main file and shows me what to do.  It's true ...I really believe in this power all of us have, but few of us recognize at this time in our historical inverted pyramid of knowledge!

Happy New Year of the Red Fire Chicken

Now, being an environmentalist and basically vegetarian I can't help but think,,,this Chinese New Year animal looks like it should be part of a menu!!  However, it is not to be devoured but savoured in our souls, bodies and minds like a prophetic good omen of real change in our world🐔

I believe in the stars...and I believe in oracles.  We are Star Children and every culture has their own way of looking at the heavens.  I believe in a Great Creator, A God and the Goddess.  I am part of the first goddess ever to walk on the heavenly path of the Milky Way.  ☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

We enter a new era.  Love life, the art of life is with you.  Read my love story.

Star Water Book One Sweet Sorcerer

Time for a happy red fire monkey!

I refer to the Chinese New Year today - year of the Red Fire Monkey...so have a good one!  I feel better.  My strength is good.  Looking back at blogs it's a wonder how one's mood changes when one is ill with an injury.  Still, I can't watch too much action, like movies of people leaping and falling etc as I tend to think "Ouch!"  I appreciate the joy of movement more than ever...and things I aspire to do when recovered.  I miss surfing, miss it with a passion.  My physiotherapy is geared toward surfing again.  My book is on the crest of a mighty tropical barrel, a wave of great potential!  Check Star Water you Starchildren!  Links are everywhere.

I long for an online literary salon

I'm injured and recovering.  While I heal, comforts have included an overstuffed comfy couch by the fireside and me at night reading, dreaming.  I long for an online literary and artistic salon, like the one Gertrude Stein enjoyed in Paris, where Ernest Hemingway, F Scott Fritzgerald, Pablo Picasso, Henri Matisse, and other highly regarded artists shared their views, thoughts, and helped to create the Modernist Movement.

Without ranting, without complaining, I'll say with a wistful whisper - no one cares anymore.  Where is sophistication, elevated thought inspiring like an upward spiral to the gods, where are the true creators of new ways to be?  Squashed among a pile of competing, commercial, copycat authors, buried in heaps of garbage ads and marketing, the true ones, the creators are lost ...lost like clear blue waters filled with raw sewage, lost like rainforests clear cut, lost like friendly little baby animals, once innocently frolicking in green pastures and now only objects on factory farms, destined for the slaughterhouse before they learn to feel the joy of running.

It was all so fun when we really wanted to learn and think, when we wanted to change the world for the better instead of competing with each other.

Yes, I long for an online literary and artistic salon.  I'll wait and create and believe it can happen again.

Seven plus seven - my time of manifestation

Hey all, I'm still at it, looking to publish my book with the right house and not wanting the editors to change everything...because I know where the story is going, they don't.  I'm not saying the book is perfect.  I want to change some sentences.  The voice is Merleena's however, telling the story as it happened, not as the story is happening, and she says it all in a type of teenspeak - imperfect and authentic.

Yesterday was the 7th day of the 7th month, an important time.  The 12 houses of constellations are a big part of why we are here created from the stars...Hence my Star Water series, starting with Silver Rain, formerly known as Sweet Sorcerer, basically the same book except Silver Rain is slightly edited by me.

I wish you a happy summer...I wish you would consider reading about Merleena & Owen!

Why read Star Water? Here's why...

Okay, I'm getting down to it!  Why should you read my Star Water series?  Every once in a while, you see a book or movie or hear music so inspiring it changes your life for the better.  This has happened to me - the Twilight series...come on, there are others!  The book Lassie Come Home, the movie Marnie by Alfred Hitchcock starring Tippi Hedren. The album Led Zeppelin 3.  Kurt Cobain songs.  These things change the world - not just my world but everyone's...for the better!  I could create an infinite list.  The clue is finding a new way to be.

I need optimism, love, peace, grace, especially grace and dignity!  Our animals on Earth need to have dignity restored, I'm working on it.  They are not disposable.  Live my life gracefully and find my own truth.  Now...will my book Star Water find you a million dollars?  Maybe, don't rule it out!  Will you find many hidden layers of love and the meaning of man and woman?  Yes, you will.  Will you find out more about the mysteries of our world and why we are here...yes, I think you will.  Humor?  Yes, very important to uplift the soul...irony and humor.

So check it out here!  It's a new wave for us to surf.  The internet and water...two things to surf and connected in my life.

Next time I'll talk about my characters...on the path to prosperity in many subtle ways!

Updating, my little clones.

No, not updating my little clones but updating my blog for the little clones.  I don't care what I say...Lady Gaga has her little monsters & I have my little clones - they all follow follow follow like they are onto something and then ...on to the next thing five minutes later, and back to the first thing again.  Eg. - a certain famous dark haired family of sisters and mom has dominated the gossip scene for years - and this is because they stand for nothing - no commitments, no great causes for society...just a huge void of nothing except "airing their dirty laundry in public".  What a tragic waste of time and space on tv and tabloids.  They could help the world...but no, clones would be scared as clones would have to think of how to help the world!!!

Yikes!  Help!  We're all going past the edge of no return soon!  Where is the beauty, the interest in learning about this beautiful world?  Are we afraid to explore?  What if early explorers felt the way clones feel?  We'd all be in Europe, fighting for territory even more than now!  We'd even be living in subzero temps because of the crowds.  We have to explore possibilities, clones!!  I explore!!  Check Sweet Sorcerer - Star Water series  The way of the future is to see it:)

Another point to notice - having a famous father or mother doesn't guarantee fame. I don't want to give examples but many exist, even if they try to follow the footsteps, it doesn't work that way.  Being shocking doesn't ensure fame...or being different.  But it helps sometimes.  But being a clone doesn't get you anywhere, just look around and try to find some examples of exceptions to this rule.  Be different, be truthful, be fair, be the best you can be and do it with purity and love in your heart.  That's all there is to know for now.

Below is a pic of  Eternity Bay, Oahu in Feb - the location of the famous beach scene in "From Here to Eternity."  Stolen love - one chance, remembered forever...Now THAT's what dreams are made of all you lovers!

 

I'm back, healthy and happy - is that not cool?

I'm back from Hawaii...and goddess Pele has surely taught a lesson to me.  I wiped out a bit in the surf, nothing serious - a few bandaids to show for it.  My body felt the power of Oahu's waves...but my muscles, unaccustomed to rough seas, ached a good ache afterward.  I was under the spell of Hawaii and Pele, reminded once again what a feeble race we are compared to goddesses.  I surfed some good waves, had fun...I'm healthy.

After I got home a few days ago I checked websites about books, trying to promote my book.  How old fashioned, powerless, and downright sad it is to me to see female authors promoting their books in negative ways.  Is it a fashionable thing now to say how different, uncool, unpopular, dorky, reclusive, odd etc etc you are?  Is this self portrayal supposed to attract readers and potential buyers of your books, ladies??  What type of women are you trying to reach and what are you trying to say?

This approach is not only distasteful to me as a woman, it's downplaying the intelligence of the reader.  Does the author want me to feel sorry for her...relate to her...or what?

Give me books of inspiration, written by well adjusted, popular, learning, happy people.  Give me something to aspire to.  I try to inspire people with my books.  I am a new wave.  I have something to offer.  I'm not going out on a tiny limb, trying to attract insecure, reclusive females and I'm not capitalizing on their insecurities, rather, I'm celebrating the power and beauty of women in my love story  Star Water - Part One - Silver Rain or if you like the earlier original version Star Water - Part One - Sweet Sorcerer .  Either or...it doesn't matter, personally I prefer Silver Rain because the revisions are slight but good.

No...I'm not going out on a tiny limb, perched there afraid to fly, sitting with a bunch of fearful timid ones saying "What if?"  Here's what if...push.  Now fly to Summerland and dive deep into Star Water.  We have a whole world to explore and you have to be healthy to do it.

Love is pain

I tweeted about love today.  I've been gone awhile...moving, happy...but love is pain, neither good nor bad but pain of emotions surging in my heart.  Love isn't all smooth as glass, deceptively transparent.  Love is broken glass to get to the other side.  If you shine silver it becomes clear, like a mirror.  Can I get to the other side?  So clear I can disappear, become a reflection, invisible.

I had a dream of Kurt Cobain last night.  He showed me what to do, he explained so easily...He's another sun in Pisces, full of sacrifice, wisdom of all astrological signs combined.  Pisces men, beautiful skin, smooth as glass... a liquid quiet surface, transparent vision. I met him on another level, another plane like he sang about...I'm on a plane.  I met him in my dream.

David Gilmour, I want to meet him...on a plane, any level - he's here on this level - do I have to wait?  Earls Court last night...Earls Court is going down, the wrecking ball.  Is nothing sacred?

New look, revised book now at Swoon Reads

Hey Clones - well, Lady Gaga calls her fans "my little monsters" so I thought I would say what I thought!  The reason I say "Clones" is because I'm finding all the bestsellers, talking about books, are dystopian gross nightmares of a devilish world...and young people are buying into this terrible myth.  No wonder we're seeing so many suicides and so much depression.  It doesn't have to be that way.  Steer this ship around!  Dystopian books are not necessary.  A dystopian society is not real.  Don't eat it up...they want your souls, little Clones.

I won't even give in and say "not that there's anything wrong with that" because there's something severely wrong if we are following authors who lead us on a path of destruction and hopelessness.  Severely wrong...and the main reason authors write this way is...drum roll...MONEY.  Publishers and editors tell us to write these gross stories of despair because, well, everyone else does it...and it seems to work...and kids buy it.

I try to stick to my goals and show some integrity but that's not the main reason I wrote this book.  I want to help...Earth, animals, people...and the way to help is through love.  Also I have something to show the little Clones...there IS another way to exist.  To survive, we have to look at all the signs and omens around us and in Star Water - Part 1 - Silver Rain  I show you how to look for these signals.

I uploaded the new revised version of Star Water Part 1 at Swoon Reads   If you don't want to look, I don't care, continue to be a crowd follower.  I don't care about money or if my book sells.  Suit yourself.  If you want to see a new way, then read it.

My new revised book - Silver Rain

I'm very pleased and excited to announce the publication of my new e-book at the HarperCollins website, Authonomy, in England!  This is an entirely blissful dream come true...for as you know, readers, I love music, rock bands, especially the classic Brit bands and my book embraces all of these lovely concepts.  As well, the original themes of romantic supernature are here, all within Star Water - Part 1 - Silver Rain  free to you for now and brand new today!

Movie Star Boy - lyrics

I'm prolific ha!  I think it's the heat wave and a specific type of "sun high", which I love...the lazy hazy crazy days of summer.  A song I wrote today - a true story.  I've thought about this boy...where did he go?  These lyrics are influenced by my some of my favorite musicians, Pink Floyd being way up there.  I think the style is all my own - see if you think a song is in here, in the lines.  Happy Birthday Rick Wright, way up there.

As always, no one try to take these lyrics as I will find you with a little help from the Neptune Pink Floyd  forum, thanks.

Movie Star Boy

Movie star boy, movie star boy

Where is the joy?

Out in your yard

Your black and white dog

Standing on guard.

This is your life

Your common-law wife

Is laughing outside

Your daughter turned one

I know you  tried

Movie star boy.

Last summer you sang

With friends at the shore

You had a guitar

Your skin was so tanned

I walked past, you smiled

Angel faced child

Movie star boy, movie star boy.

And now you stand wearing jeans

In your rented yard

Your shiny black hair

Your face worn with care

Should be on the big screen

Should really be seen

So young and ignored

Restless and bored.

Why don’t you just run

To Hollywood town?

This girl brought you down

Your daughter will know

Just send them the dough

I live down the street

I can’t understand

Movie star boy, movie star boy

Why can’t you see

What it means to be free?

Copyright Luvelle Raevan July 2014

We don't know anything

Today I woke up with the feeling of how little we know about our world.  Really we don't know anything.  Think of any topic...like birds flying.  What are they doing and why do all species have different sounds?  Is each frequency, each wavelength part of a huge pattern in the world?  I think so.  What are the seasons about, and why are we here?  We don't know, nobody does.  We can believe and go by our intuition...that's all.  I know love feels good.  Love isn't upsetting and unhealthy - that's not love imo...I don't know what feelings of unhappiness are about - but those feelings are not about love.

I wrote more lyrics at the beach a few days ago.  Actually, Jupiter entered Leo on that day...but I felt like it was Mars.  This one is about someone who existed in an alternate reality and we could not go on.  If I have true love, it's not like this little rhyme I made up in a childlike moment.

Mars Enters Leo

You came to me as I sat

On my throne of sand,

The hottest day ever

In the land.

I could not see your eyes –

The sun was too bright

And besides, they were shaded

And framed just like night.

We talked about nothing

Yet everything was there

Hidden and showing

Like my hat hid my hair

And beach curls blonde

Fell in wet strands around

My listening ears

As I sat on the ground.

But we talked about nothing

I wouldn’t go there

Back to the time

When I really cared.

Blame it on the lion

And the planet of war

Combined together

On a sandy shore.

Copyright Luvelle Raevan 2014

Songs and solar return

Hello, welcome to my new year!  As the title above suggests, astronomy is involved and I just had a birthday a few days ago.  I've joined Neptune Pink Floyd - the newsletter and forum.  Having been a member on various forums throughout the last 12 or more years, I can honestly say so far the Pink Floyd forum members are some of the best fans I've encountered.  They are educated, articulate and most of all - they love the music.

Here's David Gilmour videos from back in the early days.  Oh my lord - he's positively angelic!! Something I'll refrain from saying over at the forum...want to be professional ha!

I wrote two new songs at the beach - copyrighted by me and people out there don't try to use them because I have the Pink Floyd forum to back me...the lyrics are mine!  For DG...Piscean (with moon in Aries same degree as my Aries moon)

The Difference Is Night And Day

Come on sun in your lonely dance,

Come on full moon in my midnight trance –

I want to see my way in the dark

In the light, in the dark, in the light,

In the dark

All in one day – what can I say?

I want to walk with him in the park –

Mix up daydreams with dreams in my sleep

Enter my heart with secrets I keep

Open my mind with probes made of love

I want to see what happens above –

In the light, in the dark, in the light

In the dark

All in one day

All in one day

What can I say?

All in a day.

If we see Venus and lightning strikes –

I can’t tell daydreams from dreams at night

Don’t tell me the difference –

I don’t want to know

My love has to go

Where I want to go

All in one day

What can I say?

What can I say?

Copyright Luvelle Raevan

Wings of Glass

When a slow boat passes

Near metallic shores

And nine seagulls stand

On silver sand

With white feathers blown

In a warm south breeze

That’s where I’ve known

Clear memories.

When sharp sounds drift

On wings of glass

And blue meets blue

And love is new

Through sunglasses

I see your dark shape

And I’m still thinking

Of love we make.

When a sailboat passes

Near glitter shores

And nine seagulls stand

On silver sand.

Copyright Luvelle Raevan

A new song for you!

Happy Canada Day, all you stereotyped plaid shirted, beer swillin' & champagne snobs regarding Canadian literature, we have much to be thankful for...like...er...um...ahem...er...Just joking!  Yes, we have several good things about Canada.  We know how to fight against oil pipelines - but this time let's not cave in to pressures of the East...and I mean the Far East, too. I don't want to think about it.

Instead, here's a new song I wrote this aft at the beach, in between swims.  Most of my inspiration is at the beach in summer.  See if you like it.  My strength is my whimsy.  This one is dedicated to Floyd, and to David's Strat guitars.

  Aliens – Alliance

Come on now sweet sorcerer

Your muses we will not ignore

You climb into my dreams at night –

You know, my angel, that’s all right

You hang around my bed with me –

And tell me ancient history

Of crystal caves

And men of stone

And women kind

I’m not alone.

Come on, love, and tell me more

With that song I so adore

I won’t ask you anything

In case it sounds like just a fling –

Your hold on me is more than life

A thousand times of man and wife

Beaches pale sand

And water waves

I feel you’re here

In countless ways.

You hang around this world with me

And maybe we’re a tragedy

Let’s just play a favourite song

And let them say we don’t belong

I won a pillow on a website

So climb into my dreams  tonight.

Copyright Luvelle Raevan July 2014

And while I'm on the path of self promotion with you in mind....please check the first book in my Star Water series.  Sweet Sorcerer is free, I'm committed and Macmillan is a good company - we can do this!  I'll donate to my environmental and animal rights causes with some of the book series profits - a promise I made to my own God, my creator, alien maybe, sweet sorcerer imo yes!

Writing songs

I read an interesting news item today regarding animal rights activist, Pamela Anderson.  Kudos to Pam, because she's a good role model.  Same with Angelina Jolie.  These women are truly beautiful in all ways.  Why are women perceived as the sexiest ever also the most sensitive, kind, and with a difficult past?  Same with Jenna Jameson, who was a porn star...although she's not really a humanitarian in some ways, she is beautiful with a difficult past.  I'm perceived as sexy...and I've had issues in my past - but I'm not going to talk about that right now.  Like Pam, I really don't trust people very much and my loyalty is to the animal kingdom, nature, and artistic expression.  More than ever, I'm glad to be an animal rights activist as we are making progress.

My artistic expression today is a song - lyrics.  I wrote this song for one of my favourite musicians - his initials are DG and he belonged to a band with the name Floyd in it.  Can you guess?  If he wanted to collaborate I could imagine us sitting at Fleetwood's on Front St. in Lahaina, Maui (Mick Fleetwood's restaurant) and going over a few things!  Am I too bold?  No, I'm an astrologer...and I know the nature of Pisces sun sign men.  It's possible - when they want to try something new they slip away in a silver shimmer, from any grasp - leaving a person with memories as elusive as water...



                                                                     Solomon’s Son 

I love your face

Your arms hold on

A smile so warm

Are we still on?

You can’t say I didn’t try enough

You won’t say I didn’t cry enough

Your eyes of sky can see me through

To make this love completely true.

I touched your hair

And kissed your mouth

And then my mind

Went tropic south

But if you are too old for this

And our time is just passing bliss

If you feel my kisses cool

And if you find we broke the rules –

Then go.  GO!  GO! 

                                                                               

But I still stay

And I still say

I love your face

Your arms hold on

Your smile is warm

And we go on.

 Copyright Luvelle Raevan

Moving on. Breathe.

Already over a month!  Last post the thought of moving was just starting to formulate...and now I've sorted, packed, given away boxes of things to charity, cleaned, organized, fixed some things in the house and...the For Sale sign is up!  My place is in a great, desired location...great for someone else, not me.  I feel the town closing in all around me.

I want  to breathe, breathe in the air, like the Pink Floyd song on Dark Side of the Moon.  More than ever I'm beginning to see illusions of what people think they want, what people think they see.  People are crowding in all around - they think this is a wonderful tourist city with beaches and peaches.  Okay, I'll admit...it was a great town when I was much younger.  This city is a shadow of its former self, a mere memory of fresh air and friendlier less competitive people...a fond recollection of a slower pace and two lanes only for cars - even some dirt roads.

Not any more - they are 4 and 6 laning roads & highways everywhere.  When I was a child and I rested my head on my pillow at night - I'd hear crickets and distant ch-ch-ch- of metal irrigation sprinklers watering the orchards in this semi-desert town.  Those orchards are gone.  Now at night I hear traffic, distant and near.

I'm concerned about health and pollution, always.  I'm an environmentalist and animal rights activist.  What am I doing here, in this city?  Let them have it, sorry grandparents in the cemetery on the hill.  When I see you now at the graveside the main sound is traffic...and sirens sometimes...or machinery...interspersed with a bird call or two.

Wish me luck!  I'm not going far...just on outskirts in this valley in a smaller place beside a smaller lake...wandering on society's fringes with more like minded people.  With a view of the future and wanting a second little winter place in Lahaina as well!  How fast will my place sell?  All depends - who believes in the illusion strongly and the place is theirs.

I have to get back to promoting my book while I wait for the sale.  The time has gone by quickly indeed.  Til later...breathe, breathe in the air...

May Day & Visions not Revisions

Happy May Day!  I'm behind on my blog updates and I'll be going on a little vacay soon so I thought a new entry here would be a good idea.  Now... friends in life and followers on Twitter this is what I have to say.  My free book  Star Water - Book One - Sweet Sorcerer up at the Swoonreads website for awhile now and when I get back from the holiday I expect to see a lot of comments and ratings!  Ha!  Seriously, I would do it for you.

One thing I've learned through the experience of offering my book online is...some friends and relatives can be dismissive.  Not only do they not want to help me, they're not interested in something new...or maybe (and this thought has crept into my mind recently) some people just don't want to see me succeed.  It's a weird trip, this book series - in many ways but I'm so glad to learn more about people and life, really!

Star Water - Book Two (and I'll reveal the title later) ends on May Day.  This is a significant event in the second book of my series.  May Day is a significant event since recorded time began.

About visions and revisions.  Take the words literally.  When I wrote these books it was all about my vision.  Not the publishers, editors, agents revision.  Revision is like Re-seeing.  Why?  What's wrong with the first vision?  Nothing, it's all mine and I intend to keep my vision and not have it run through the publishing industry until my idea isn't mine anymore.  Too much change from the beginning to final product these days and unnecessarily so. The current fad is to change everything. The author's voice is lost and becomes the editor's voice.  I don't need my books to be polished gems.  I want them unearthed, glittering and full of possibilities for the reader to imagine.  Ttys!

Music of the Spheres, Enchantment and Eclipses

I'm going to combine a few ideas here, the concept of oneness. We all want to know the mystical secrets of our existence - no one knows but we can learn as we go!

I came across the old Pythagoran theory and refreshed my memory - the music of the spheres, architecture of sound, a mathematical equation.  All is harmonious in nature - Pythagoras was a mindblowing genius.  Combining vibrations to build - because all matter is vibrations.  How does sound and music fit into this picture?   We all have our ideas.

Of course it's no secret I think Pink Floyd musicians are amazing.  They experimented with sounds like no other band - everything from dogs singing along to breakfast frying, to the ping of electronic equipment.  The ping is in news today a lot, due to the MH370 aircraft search.  I think it may be in the Gobi Desert and I've said so online - no one listens though...and I hate to speculate as so many people are grieving so I won't dwell on my theory.  I wish I could help.

Here's a video 'Live at Pompeii', music featured on Pink Floyd's albums, Meddle -  Echoes - the lyrics are divinely inspired and the music is a gift from another dimension, and it's no secret how much I think David is a hottie too, then and now!

What I want to say is science, magic and nature are one - they have to be, there's no other way we could be alive in our reality.  My book is still up for free at Swoonreads - exclusive there until the eclipse on April 14th at midnight in the Pacific NW just as April 15th begins - and then after that I'm free to sell the book to any publisher I choose - but they have to want it!  Sweet Sorcerer is all about teenagers discovering the path of enchantment, dreams and all things Neptunian. Check it here!
Star Water - Book One - Sweet Sorcerer

Also, I'm exploring another of our senses - the scents.  I found my powerful potion quite by chance, in a shop - and now it has been pulled from the shelves.  The scented lotion is a hot fragrance - smells hot, the best way to describe.  Has the word Heat in the name, too, and drives men wild - believe me I've tested it lol!  I analysed the ingredients and when my book becomes well known I intend to market my fragrance - the name is already chosen!

 Enchantment takes shape in many forms - Happy Full Moon mid April!  I like to say we'll have a Pink Moon, as natives here call it.  Science calls it a  Blood Moon  This is good, this is very good, for my art & my love.